Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place
Friday | 20:10-22:30
Stoneham Lane Football Complex, Stoneham Lane, Eastleigh, SO16 2PA
Welcome to MAN v FAT Eastleigh. This is an active Club. Please feel free to sign up and your MAN v FAT coach will be in touch soon. (You will not be charged a monthly subscription of £35 until your place in the club is confirmed). You may qualify for funding via Hampshire County Council for members registering with a Hampshire County Council Postcode (Excludes Portsmouth & Southampton - you'll be able to see if you're eligible before you make a payment to register.
As a original Season 1 player from MvF Eastleigh, my journey has taken me from player, to facilitator to Coach. I'm dedicated to helping individuals achieve their health and weight loss goals through the power of football. With a love for team sports, I believe regular exercise and diet should be fun, interesting and inclusive! Having seen the transformative effects of combining physical activity with wider-team support and tracking progress, MvF Eastleigh is a welcoming environment for all skill levels, whether you’re a seasoned player or a beginner. The team and I are here to motivate and guide you on your journey to better health. With personalized coaching, nutritional programs and engaging challenges, we empower all team members to reach their goals while enjoying a weekly game of Football!
Joe Cooper, Coach, Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place
Leaderboard
Season Sixteen | 2025
#
Team
Pl
W
Pts
1
Cholesterol Palace (Red)
9
9
18
2
Chubby Custards (Yellow)
9
7
14
3
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
9
6
12
4
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
9
6
12
5
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
9
4
8
6
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
9
3
7
7
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
9
3
6
8
Ozempiacos (Black)
9
3
6
9
Flaberdeen FC (Green)
9
2
4
10
Diabético Madrid (Pink)
9
1
3
“I started half the man and twice the person, and I’ve come out half the person but twice the man.”
Harry Spacagna
Latest league fixtures / results
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 125 | 59 | 66 | 18 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 9 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 93 | 56 | 37 | 14 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 9 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 84 | 58 | 26 | 12 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 9 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 78 | 74 | 4 | 12 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 9 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 59 | 72 | -13 | 8 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 9 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 52 | 62 | -10 | 7 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 9 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 69 | 81 | -12 | 6 |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 9 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 66 | 81 | -15 | 6 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 9 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 54 | 73 | -19 | 4 |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 9 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 40 | 104 | -64 | 3 |
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 9 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 23 | 13 | 10 | 13 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 9 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 37 | 11 | 26 | 12 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 9 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 14 | 16 | -2 | 12 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 9 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 22 | 14 | 8 | 10 |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 9 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 26 | 18 | 8 | 9 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 9 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 19 | -3 | 9 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 9 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 16 | 14 | 2 | 8 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 9 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 17 | 19 | -2 | 7 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 9 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 19 | 35 | -16 | 6 |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 9 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 40 | -31 | 4 |
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 9 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 54 | 14 | 40 | 17 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 9 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 12 | 20 | 16 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 9 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 32 | 14 | 18 | 11 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 9 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 25 | 16 | 9 | 11 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 9 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 23 | 26 | -3 | 8 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 9 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 23 | 31 | -8 | 8 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 9 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 13 | 25 | -12 | 7 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 9 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 17 | -11 | 6 |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 9 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 14 | 40 | -26 | 5 |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 9 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 33 | -27 | 1 |
| Team | Player | Weight Score | Loss Percentage |
|---|---|---|---|
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | James Nash | 19.00 | 8.34% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Brian Birch | 16.00 | 21.83% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Timothy Shipwey | 16.00 | 15.11% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Nygel West | 13.50 | 8.32% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Jonathan Rumsey | 11.50 | 8.74% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Michael Barrow | 11.00 | 6.85% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Craig Frampton | 10.50 | 9.50% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Mike Stephens | 10.50 | 2.73% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Adam Hunt | 9.00 | 5.28% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Thomas simons | 8.50 | 5.74% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Brian Edwards | 8.00 | 5.81% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Jonathon Canning | 8.00 | 5.09% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Steve Jones | 8.00 | 3.94% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Kevin West | 8.00 | 3.81% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Scott Exell | 8.00 | 3.32% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Chris Hescott | 8.00 | -0.12% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Nathan Middleton | 7.50 | 1.90% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Chris Eager | 7.00 | 8.05% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Kieran Davies | 6.00 | 3.47% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | David Bradford | 6.00 | 1.78% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Matthew King | 5.50 | 1.13% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Jonathan Mottram | 5.00 | 4.68% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | David Godfrey | 5.00 | 3.41% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Lloyd Thomas | 5.00 | 3.37% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | James Lacey | 5.00 | 1.37% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Jack Quinton | 3.50 | 4.17% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Darren Hall | 3.50 | 1.76% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Oscar Easton | 3.50 | 1.36% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Darren Cawte | 3.50 | 1.27% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Ashley Healey | 3.50 | 0.66% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Lewis King | 3.50 | 0.40% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Jack Sherred | 3.50 | -0.45% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Alan McDonald | 3.00 | 3.43% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Michael Ronan | 3.00 | 0.79% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Stuart Redding | 2.50 | 2.93% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Dave Carey | 2.50 | 1.89% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Ryan Bishop | 2.50 | 1.89% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | JON BROOK | 2.50 | 1.24% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Matthew Cook | 2.50 | 0.57% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Drew Brisley | 2.00 | 3.89% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Stuart White | 2.00 | 1.58% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Daniel Jewell | 2.00 | 1.16% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Paul Russell | 1.50 | 1.38% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Pablo Hazell | 1.50 | 0.71% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Matthew Colwell | 1.50 | 0.50% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Michael Salt | 1.50 | 0.42% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Thomas Downer | 1.50 | 0.25% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Christopher Addoo | 1.50 | 0.19% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Bradley Evans | 1.50 | -0.11% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Kieran James | 1.50 | -0.86% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Jack Medlock | 1.00 | -0.15% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Scott Watt | 0.50 | 2.43% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Ryan Hicks | 0.50 | 0.68% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Louis Whitfield | 0.50 | 0.64% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Paul Fawley | 0.50 | 0.43% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Chris Wareham | 0.50 | 0.11% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Richard Moseley | 0.50 | -1.33% |
Upcoming Cup Matches
-
Friday 19 December
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 20:10Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 19 December
Cholesterol Palace (Red)VS 20:20Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 19 December
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 20:40Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 19 December
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:50ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 19 December
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 21:10Flaberdeen FC (Green)
Recent Cup Match Results
-
Friday 05 December
Flaberdeen FC (Green)2 - 11Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)6 - 10Cholesterol Palace (Red)Ozempiacos (Black)12 - 5Diabético Madrid (Pink)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)1 - 11Chubby Custards (Yellow)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)3 - 6Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 07 November
Chubby Custards (Yellow)13 - 8Diabético Madrid (Pink)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)11 - 11Cholesterol Palace (Red)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)5 - 4Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Ozempiacos (Black)17 - 9Flaberdeen FC (Green)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)8 - 7Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 10 October
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)3 - 9Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Ozempiacos (Black)5 - 5Chubby Custards (Yellow)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)11 - 8Diabético Madrid (Pink)Flaberdeen FC (Green)9 - 9Cholesterol Palace (Red)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)8 - 5Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 19 December
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black)Cholesterol Palace (Red)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green)
No upcoming fixtures Check back soon for more information.
Tap score to see breakdown.
-
Friday 12 December
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)6 - 7Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Flaberdeen FC (Green)6 - 10Ozempiacos (Black)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)7 - 5ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Diabético Madrid (Pink)2 - 20Chubby Custards (Yellow)Cholesterol Palace (Red)12 - 9Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 28 November
Chubby Custards (Yellow)7 - 5Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)13 - 9Ozempiacos (Black)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)12 - 4ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Cholesterol Palace (Red)11 - 6Flaberdeen FC (Green)Diabético Madrid (Pink)10 - 14Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 21 November
Diabético Madrid (Pink)4 - 15Cholesterol Palace (Red)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)8 - 6Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)8 - 5Man Titty FC (Light Blue)Ozempiacos (Black)7 - 12Chubby Custards (Yellow)Flaberdeen FC (Green)12 - 15ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 14 November
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)3 - 7ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Diabético Madrid (Pink)1 - 9Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)7 - 3Flaberdeen FC (Green)Man Titty FC (Light Blue)7 - 9Ozempiacos (Black)Chubby Custards (Yellow)9 - 12Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 31 October
Flaberdeen FC (Green)7 - 8Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)9 - 6Ozempiacos (Black)Man Titty FC (Light Blue)6 - 12Chubby Custards (Yellow)Diabético Madrid (Pink)1 - 16Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Cholesterol Palace (Red)15 - 4ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 24 October
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)4 - 6Chubby Custards (Yellow)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)8 - 3Diabético Madrid (Pink)Ozempiacos (Black)4 - 13Cholesterol Palace (Red)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)6 - 7Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Flaberdeen FC (Green)5 - 4Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 17 October
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)11 - 7Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Cholesterol Palace (Red)19 - 8Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Diabético Madrid (Pink)7 - 11Ozempiacos (Black)Chubby Custards (Yellow)9 - 7ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)3 - 7Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 03 October
Cholesterol Palace (Red)8 - 5Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Diabético Madrid (Pink)5 - 4Flaberdeen FC (Green)Chubby Custards (Yellow)8 - 9Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)8 - 5Ozempiacos (Black)Man Titty FC (Light Blue)6 - 3ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 26 September
Ozempiacos (Black)5 - 6ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)10 - 13Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Flaberdeen FC (Green)4 - 10Chubby Custards (Yellow)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)7 - 7Diabético Madrid (Pink)Cholesterol Palace (Red)20 - 10Man Titty FC (Light Blue)