Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place
Friday | 20:10-22:30
Stoneham Lane Football Complex, Stoneham Lane, Eastleigh, SO16 2PA
Welcome to MAN v FAT Eastleigh. Please feel free to sign up and your MAN v FAT coach will be in touch soon. (You will not be charged a monthly subscription of £35 until your place in the club is confirmed). You may qualify for funding via Hampshire County Council for members registering with a Hampshire County Council Postcode (Excludes Portsmouth & Southampton - you'll be able to see if you're eligible before you make a payment to register.
As a original Season 1 player from MvF Eastleigh, my journey has taken me from player, to facilitator to Coach. I'm dedicated to helping individuals achieve their health and weight loss goals through the power of football. With a love for team sports, I believe regular exercise and diet should be fun, interesting and inclusive! Having seen the transformative effects of combining physical activity with wider-team support and tracking progress, MvF Eastleigh is a welcoming environment for all skill levels, whether you’re a seasoned player or a beginner. The team and I are here to motivate and guide you on your journey to better health. With personalized coaching, nutritional programs and engaging challenges, we empower all team members to reach their goals while enjoying a weekly game of Football!
Joe Cooper, Coach, Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place
Leaderboard
Season Sixteen | 2025
#
Team
Pl
W
Pts
1
Cholesterol Palace (Red)
2
2
4
2
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
2
2
4
3
Diabético Madrid (Pink)
2
1
3
4
Chubby Custards (Yellow)
2
1
2
5
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
2
1
2
6
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
2
1
2
7
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
2
1
2
8
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
2
0
1
9
Ozempiacos (Black)
2
0
0
10
Flaberdeen FC (Green)
2
0
0
“I started half the man and twice the person, and I’ve come out half the person but twice the man.”
Harry Spacagna
Latest league fixtures / results
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 15 | 13 | 4 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 21 | 15 | 6 | 4 |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 11 | 1 | 3 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 13 | 5 | 2 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 21 | -2 | 2 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 11 | -2 | 2 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 23 | -7 | 2 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 15 | -3 | 1 |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 14 | -4 | 0 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 15 | -7 | 0 |
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 4 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 2 | 3 |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 2 | 4 | 2 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 3 | -1 | 1 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 | -1 | 1 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | -3 | 1 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 10 | -7 | 0 |
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | PTS | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 6 | 11 | 4 |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 5 | 5 | 4 |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 6 | 3 | 2 |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 2 | 2 |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | -1 | 2 |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 | -2 | 2 |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | -3 | 2 |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 15 | -6 | 2 |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 4 | -3 | 0 |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 9 | -6 | 0 |
| Team | Player | Weight Score | Loss Percentage |
|---|---|---|---|
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Gary Young | 5.00 | 2.49% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | James Nash | 5.00 | 2.06% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Timothy Shipwey | 4.00 | 4.97% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Michael Barrow | 4.00 | 4.11% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Brian Birch | 4.00 | 3.96% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Thomas simons | 4.00 | 1.62% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Kevin West | 4.00 | 1.44% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Steven Topazio | 4.00 | 1.36% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Mike Stephens | 4.00 | 1.23% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Sam Scott | 3.50 | 2.54% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Kieran James | 3.50 | 1.72% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Nygel West | 1.00 | 2.81% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Nathan Middleton | 1.00 | 0.91% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Mark Holman | 1.00 | 0.70% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | James Newell | 1.00 | 0.63% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Michael Ronan | 1.00 | 0.59% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Jack Sherred | 1.00 | 0.56% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Michael Wedge | 1.00 | 0.56% |
| Diabético Madrid (Pink) | Daniel Andrews | 1.00 | 0.44% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Chris Hescott | 1.00 | 0.24% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Craig Frampton | 0.50 | 3.36% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Darren Hall | 0.50 | 2.35% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Jonathan Mottram | 0.50 | 1.87% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | JON BROOK | 0.50 | 1.50% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Brad Halls | 0.50 | 1.39% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Dave Carey | 0.50 | 1.30% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Jonathon Canning | 0.50 | 1.19% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Richard Homer | 0.50 | 1.18% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Steve Jones | 0.50 | 1.13% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Adam Hunt | 0.50 | 1.11% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Nick Freemantle | 0.50 | 0.96% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Karl Bernstien | 0.50 | 0.93% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Justin Loader | 0.50 | 0.86% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Matthew Colwell | 0.50 | 0.79% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Chris Wareham | 0.50 | 0.75% |
| Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) | Jonathan Rumsey | 0.50 | 0.74% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | James Lacey | 0.50 | 0.69% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Ryan Bishop | 0.50 | 0.66% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Nigel Lane | 0.50 | 0.65% |
| Cholesterol Palace (Red) | Matthew King | 0.50 | 0.63% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Jack Medlock | 0.50 | 0.53% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Ashley Healey | 0.50 | 0.49% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Darren Cawte | 0.50 | 0.40% |
| Flaberdeen FC (Green) | Mike Minnis | 0.50 | 0.37% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Paul Russell | 0.50 | 0.37% |
| Snackrington Stanley (Orange) | Joshua Reynolds | 0.50 | 0.29% |
| ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) | Richard Moseley | 0.50 | 0.21% |
| Chubby Custards (Yellow) | Matthew Cook | 0.50 | 0.16% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | David Bradford | 0.50 | 0.13% |
| Ozempiacos (Black) | Lloyd Thomas | 0.50 | 0.10% |
| Ozempic Lyonnais (White) | Bradley Evans | 0.50 | 0.00% |
| Man Titty FC (Light Blue) | Matthew Stewart | 0.50 | 0.00% |
Upcoming Cup Matches
-
Friday 10 October
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 20:10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 10 October
Flaberdeen FC (Green)VS 20:20Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 10 October
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)VS 20:40Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 10 October
Ozempiacos (Black)VS 20:50Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 10 October
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 21:10Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 07 November
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)VS 20:10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 07 November
Ozempiacos (Black)VS 20:20Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 07 November
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 20:40Snackrington Stanley (Orange) -
Friday 07 November
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 20:50Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 07 November
Chubby Custards (Yellow)VS 21:10Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 05 December
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 20:10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 05 December
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 20:20Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 05 December
Ozempiacos (Black)VS 20:40Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 05 December
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)VS 20:50Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 05 December
Flaberdeen FC (Green)VS 21:10Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
Recent Cup Match Results
-
Friday 10 October
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Man Titty FC (Light Blue)Flaberdeen FC (Green)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)0 - 0Diabético Madrid (Pink)Ozempiacos (Black)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 07 November
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)0 - 0Man Titty FC (Light Blue)Ozempiacos (Black)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red)Chubby Custards (Yellow)0 - 0Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 05 December
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0Man Titty FC (Light Blue)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow)Ozempiacos (Black)0 - 0Diabético Madrid (Pink)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red)Flaberdeen FC (Green)0 - 0Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
-
Friday 17 October
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:10Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 17 October
Chubby Custards (Yellow)VS 20:20ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 17 October
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 20:40Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 17 October
Cholesterol Palace (Red)VS 20:50Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 17 October
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 21:10Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 24 October
Flaberdeen FC (Green)VS 20:10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 24 October
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)VS 20:20Snackrington Stanley (Orange) -
Friday 24 October
Ozempiacos (Black)VS 20:40Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 24 October
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 20:50Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 24 October
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 21:10Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 31 October
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:10Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 31 October
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 20:20Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 31 October
Cholesterol Palace (Red)VS 20:40ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 31 October
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 20:50Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 31 October
Flaberdeen FC (Green)VS 21:10Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 14 November
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:10Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 14 November
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 20:20Snackrington Stanley (Orange) -
Friday 14 November
Chubby Custards (Yellow)VS 20:40Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 14 November
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 20:50Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 14 November
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 21:10Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 21 November
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)VS 20:10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 21 November
Ozempiacos (Black)VS 20:20Ozempic Lyonnais (White) -
Friday 21 November
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)VS 20:40Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 21 November
Flaberdeen FC (Green)VS 20:50Diabético Madrid (Pink) -
Friday 21 November
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 21:10Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 28 November
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:10Snackrington Stanley (Orange) -
Friday 28 November
Cholesterol Palace (Red)VS 20:20Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 28 November
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 20:40Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 28 November
Chubby Custards (Yellow)VS 20:50Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 28 November
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)VS 21:10ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 12 December
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)VS 20:10Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 12 December
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)VS 20:20Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 12 December
Cholesterol Palace (Red)VS 20:40Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 12 December
Diabético Madrid (Pink)VS 20:50ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 12 December
Chubby Custards (Yellow)VS 21:10Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
Tap score to see breakdown.
-
Friday 03 October
Cholesterol Palace (Red)8 - 5Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Diabético Madrid (Pink)5 - 4Flaberdeen FC (Green)Chubby Custards (Yellow)8 - 9Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)8 - 5Ozempiacos (Black)Man Titty FC (Light Blue)6 - 3ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 26 September
Ozempiacos (Black)5 - 6ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)10 - 13Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Flaberdeen FC (Green)4 - 10Chubby Custards (Yellow)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)7 - 7Diabético Madrid (Pink)Cholesterol Palace (Red)20 - 10Man Titty FC (Light Blue) -
Friday 17 October
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Chubby Custards (Yellow)0 - 0ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black)Cholesterol Palace (Red)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green) -
Friday 24 October
Flaberdeen FC (Green)0 - 0Man Titty FC (Light Blue)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)0 - 0Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Ozempiacos (Black)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Diabético Madrid (Pink)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow) -
Friday 31 October
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Cholesterol Palace (Red)0 - 0ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black)Flaberdeen FC (Green)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) -
Friday 14 November
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Chubby Custards (Yellow)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black) -
Friday 21 November
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)0 - 0Man Titty FC (Light Blue)Ozempiacos (Black)0 - 0Ozempic Lyonnais (White)Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)0 - 0Chubby Custards (Yellow)Flaberdeen FC (Green)0 - 0Diabético Madrid (Pink)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Cholesterol Palace (Red) -
Friday 28 November
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0Snackrington Stanley (Orange)Cholesterol Palace (Red)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Chubby Custards (Yellow)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black)Ozempic Lyonnais (White)0 - 0ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) -
Friday 12 December
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)0 - 0Flaberdeen FC (Green)Snackrington Stanley (Orange)0 - 0Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)Cholesterol Palace (Red)0 - 0Ozempiacos (Black)Diabético Madrid (Pink)0 - 0ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)Chubby Custards (Yellow)0 - 0Ozempic Lyonnais (White)