Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place

Friday | 20:10-22:30

Stoneham Lane Football Complex, Stoneham Lane, Eastleigh, SO16 2PA

Welcome to MAN v FAT Eastleigh. Please feel free to sign up and your MAN v FAT coach will be in touch soon. (You will not be charged a monthly subscription of £35 until your place in the club is confirmed). You may qualify for funding via Hampshire County Council for members registering with a Hampshire County Council Postcode (Excludes Portsmouth & Southampton - you'll be able to see if you're eligible before you make a payment to register.

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As a original Season 1 player from MvF Eastleigh, my journey has taken me from player, to facilitator to Coach. I'm dedicated to helping individuals achieve their health and weight loss goals through the power of football. With a love for team sports, I believe regular exercise and diet should be fun, interesting and inclusive! Having seen the transformative effects of combining physical activity with wider-team support and tracking progress, MvF Eastleigh is a welcoming environment for all skill levels, whether you’re a seasoned player or a beginner. The team and I are here to motivate and guide you on your journey to better health. With personalized coaching, nutritional programs and engaging challenges, we empower all team members to reach their goals while enjoying a weekly game of Football!

Joe Cooper, Coach, Eastleigh | Check now if you qualify for a funded place

Leaderboard

Season Sixteen | 2025
#
Team
Pl
W
Pts
1
Cholesterol Palace (Red)
2
2
4
2
Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
2
2
4
3
Diabético Madrid (Pink)
2
1
3
4
Chubby Custards (Yellow)
2
1
2
5
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
2
1
2
6
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
2
1
2
7
Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
2
1
2
8
Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
2
0
1
9
Ozempiacos (Black)
2
0
0
10
Flaberdeen FC (Green)
2
0
0

“I started half the man and twice the person, and I’ve come out half the person but  twice  the  man.”

Harry Spacagna

Latest league fixtures / results

P W D L F A GD PTS
Cholesterol Palace (Red) 2 2 0 0 28 15 13 4
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) 2 2 0 0 21 15 6 4
Diabético Madrid (Pink) 2 1 1 0 12 11 1 3
Chubby Custards (Yellow) 2 1 0 1 18 13 5 2
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) 2 1 0 1 19 21 -2 2
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) 2 1 0 1 9 11 -2 2
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) 2 1 0 1 16 23 -7 2
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) 2 0 1 1 12 15 -3 1
Ozempiacos (Black) 2 0 0 2 10 14 -4 0
Flaberdeen FC (Green) 2 0 0 2 8 15 -7 0
P W D L F A GD PTS
Diabético Madrid (Pink) 2 2 0 0 5 1 4 4
Chubby Custards (Yellow) 2 1 1 0 5 3 2 3
Ozempiacos (Black) 2 1 1 0 1 0 1 3
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) 2 1 1 0 1 0 1 3
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) 2 1 0 1 6 2 4 2
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) 2 1 0 1 1 1 0 2
Cholesterol Palace (Red) 2 0 1 1 2 3 -1 1
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) 2 0 1 1 3 4 -1 1
Flaberdeen FC (Green) 2 0 1 1 1 4 -3 1
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) 2 0 0 2 3 10 -7 0
P W D L F A GD PTS
Cholesterol Palace (Red) 2 2 0 0 17 6 11 4
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) 2 2 0 0 10 5 5 4
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) 2 1 0 1 9 6 3 2
Chubby Custards (Yellow) 2 1 0 1 7 5 2 2
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) 2 1 0 1 3 4 -1 2
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) 2 1 0 1 4 6 -2 2
Flaberdeen FC (Green) 2 1 0 1 2 5 -3 2
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) 2 1 0 1 9 15 -6 2
Diabético Madrid (Pink) 2 0 0 2 1 4 -3 0
Ozempiacos (Black) 2 0 0 2 3 9 -6 0
Team Player Weight Score Loss Percentage
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) Gary Young 5.00 2.49%
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) James Nash 5.00 2.06%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Timothy Shipwey 4.00 4.97%
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) Michael Barrow 4.00 4.11%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Brian Birch 4.00 3.96%
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) Thomas simons 4.00 1.62%
Chubby Custards (Yellow) Kevin West 4.00 1.44%
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) Steven Topazio 4.00 1.36%
Chubby Custards (Yellow) Mike Stephens 4.00 1.23%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Sam Scott 3.50 2.54%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Kieran James 3.50 1.72%
Diabético Madrid (Pink) Nygel West 1.00 2.81%
Flaberdeen FC (Green) Nathan Middleton 1.00 0.91%
Diabético Madrid (Pink) Mark Holman 1.00 0.70%
Ozempiacos (Black) James Newell 1.00 0.63%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Michael Ronan 1.00 0.59%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Jack Sherred 1.00 0.56%
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) Michael Wedge 1.00 0.56%
Diabético Madrid (Pink) Daniel Andrews 1.00 0.44%
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) Chris Hescott 1.00 0.24%
Ozempiacos (Black) Craig Frampton 0.50 3.36%
Chubby Custards (Yellow) Darren Hall 0.50 2.35%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Jonathan Mottram 0.50 1.87%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) JON BROOK 0.50 1.50%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Brad Halls 0.50 1.39%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) Dave Carey 0.50 1.30%
Flaberdeen FC (Green) Jonathon Canning 0.50 1.19%
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) Richard Homer 0.50 1.18%
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) Steve Jones 0.50 1.13%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Adam Hunt 0.50 1.11%
Chubby Custards (Yellow) Nick Freemantle 0.50 0.96%
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) Karl Bernstien 0.50 0.93%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Justin Loader 0.50 0.86%
Ozempiacos (Black) Matthew Colwell 0.50 0.79%
Ozempiacos (Black) Chris Wareham 0.50 0.75%
Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue) Jonathan Rumsey 0.50 0.74%
Ozempiacos (Black) James Lacey 0.50 0.69%
Ozempiacos (Black) Ryan Bishop 0.50 0.66%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Nigel Lane 0.50 0.65%
Cholesterol Palace (Red) Matthew King 0.50 0.63%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) Jack Medlock 0.50 0.53%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) Ashley Healey 0.50 0.49%
Flaberdeen FC (Green) Darren Cawte 0.50 0.40%
Flaberdeen FC (Green) Mike Minnis 0.50 0.37%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Paul Russell 0.50 0.37%
Snackrington Stanley (Orange) Joshua Reynolds 0.50 0.29%
ToulouseAlot FC (Purple) Richard Moseley 0.50 0.21%
Chubby Custards (Yellow) Matthew Cook 0.50 0.16%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) David Bradford 0.50 0.13%
Ozempiacos (Black) Lloyd Thomas 0.50 0.10%
Ozempic Lyonnais (White) Bradley Evans 0.50 0.00%
Man Titty FC (Light Blue) Matthew Stewart 0.50 0.00%

Upcoming Cup Matches

  • Friday 10 October

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    VS 20:10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 10 October

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    VS 20:20
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 10 October

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    VS 20:40
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 10 October

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    VS 20:50
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 10 October

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 21:10
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
  • Friday 07 November

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 07 November

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    VS 20:20
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 07 November

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 20:40
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
  • Friday 07 November

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    VS 20:50
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 07 November

    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    VS 21:10
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 05 December

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    VS 20:10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 05 December

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 20:20
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 05 December

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    VS 20:40
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 05 December

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    VS 20:50
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 05 December

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    VS 21:10
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)

Recent Cup Match Results

  • Friday 10 October

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    0 - 0
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    0 - 0
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    0 - 0
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
  • Friday 07 November

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    0 - 0
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    0 - 0
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    0 - 0
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 05 December

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    0 - 0
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    0 - 0
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    0 - 0
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)

 

  • Friday 17 October

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
  • Friday 17 October

    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    VS 20:20
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 17 October

    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    VS 20:40
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 17 October

    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    VS 20:50
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 17 October

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    VS 21:10
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 24 October

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    VS 20:10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 24 October

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    VS 20:20
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
  • Friday 24 October

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    VS 20:40
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 24 October

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 20:50
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 24 October

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    VS 21:10
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 31 October

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 31 October

    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    VS 20:20
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
  • Friday 31 October

    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    VS 20:40
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 31 October

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    VS 20:50
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 31 October

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    VS 21:10
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 14 November

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 14 November

    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    VS 20:20
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
  • Friday 14 November

    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    VS 20:40
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 14 November

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    VS 20:50
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 14 November

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 21:10
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 21 November

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    VS 20:10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 21 November

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    VS 20:20
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
  • Friday 21 November

    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    VS 20:40
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 21 November

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    VS 20:50
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
  • Friday 21 November

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    VS 21:10
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 28 November

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
  • Friday 28 November

    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    VS 20:20
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 28 November

    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    VS 20:40
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 28 November

    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    VS 20:50
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 28 November

    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    VS 21:10
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 12 December

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    VS 20:10
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 12 December

    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    VS 20:20
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 12 December

    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    VS 20:40
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 12 December

    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    VS 20:50
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 12 December

    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    VS 21:10
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)

Tap score to see breakdown.

  • Friday 03 October

    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    8 - 5
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    5 - 4
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    8 - 9
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    8 - 5
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    6 - 3
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 26 September

    Ozempiacos (Black)
    5 - 6
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    10 - 13
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    4 - 10
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    7 - 7
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    20 - 10
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
  • Friday 17 October

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    0 - 0
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    0 - 0
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    0 - 0
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    0 - 0
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    0 - 0
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
  • Friday 24 October

    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    0 - 0
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    0 - 0
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    0 - 0
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
  • Friday 31 October

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    0 - 0
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    0 - 0
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    0 - 0
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    0 - 0
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    0 - 0
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
  • Friday 14 November

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    0 - 0
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    0 - 0
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    0 - 0
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Ozempiacos (Black)
  • Friday 21 November

    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    0 - 0
    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    0 - 0
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    0 - 0
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    0 - 0
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    0 - 0
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
  • Friday 28 November

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    0 - 0
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    0 - 0
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    0 - 0
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    0 - 0
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)
    0 - 0
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
  • Friday 12 December

    Man Titty FC (Light Blue)
    0 - 0
    Flaberdeen FC (Green)
    Snackrington Stanley (Orange)
    0 - 0
    Paris Sandwhichmen (Dark Blue)
    Cholesterol Palace (Red)
    0 - 0
    Ozempiacos (Black)
    Diabético Madrid (Pink)
    0 - 0
    ToulouseAlot FC (Purple)
    Chubby Custards (Yellow)
    0 - 0
    Ozempic Lyonnais (White)